Do You Really Want to Become an Orthodox?

    

Dear “John”,

    I understand that you are on the way to becoming Orthodox. I know nothing about you, beyond the fact that you are English.

    Before we go any further, there is one point I should make clear. I have not been told why you are about to convert, but I assure you there is no point whatsoever if it is for negative reasons. You will find as much “wrong” (if not more) in Orthodoxy as in the Anglican or Roman Churches.

    So – the first point is, are you prepared to face lies, hypocrisy, evil and all the rest, just as much in Orthodoxy as in any other religion or denomination?

    Are you expecting a kind of earthly paradise with plenty of incense and the right kind of music?

    Do you expect to go straight to heaven if you cross yourself slowly, pompously and in the correct form from the right side?

    Have you a cookery book with all the authentic Russian recipes for Easter festivities?

    Are you an expert in kissing three times on every possible or improper occasion?

    Can you prostrate elegantly without dropping a variety of stationery out of your pockets?

    OR…..

    Have you read the Gospels?

    Have you faced Christ crucified? In the spirit have you attended the Last Supper – the meaning of Holy Communion?

    AND….

    Are you prepared, in all humility, to understand that you will never, in this life, know beyond Faith; that Faith means accepting the Truth without proof. Faith and knowledge are the ultimate contradiction –and the ultimate absorption into each other.

    Living Orthodoxy is based on paradox, which is carried on into worship – private or public.

    We know because we believe and we believe because we know.

    Above all, are you prepared to accept all things as from God?

    If we are meant, always, to be “happy”, why the Crucifixion? Are you prepared, whatever happens, to believe that somewhere, somehow, it must make sense? That does not mean passive endurance, but it means constant vigilance, listening, for what is demanded; and above all, Love.

    Poor, old, sick, to our last breath, we can love. Not sentimental nonsense so often confused with love, but the love of sacrifice – inner crucifixion of greed, envy, pride.

    And never confuse love with sentimentality.

    And never confuse worship with affectation.

    Be humble – love, even when it is difficult. Not sentimental so called love – And do not treat church worship as a theatrical performance!

    I hope that some of this makes sense,

    With my best wishes,
    Mother Thekla

    (sometime Abbess of the Monastery of the Assumption, Normanby)

Heaven and Hell

People usually work too hard to go to Heaven, that is, to avoid Hell, without love of God. But can there be Heaven without God? For Heaven means being in God for ever. We usually picture Heaven like a paradise of unspeakable beauty, filled with saved saints and angels. But where is God in all of that? 

Some people fear that Heaven might get boring after a while. But that is not true. Hell is dull. Heaven will never get boring. For in Heaven, we will never run out of love. Have you ever been bored while loving someone? You haven't. There is a reason why the first commandment is for us to love God with all our might. Because that is what Heaven is. 

Some people also think that they can be lazy in Heaven all they want. But that is not true. Heaven is constant work, but work that you enjoy. At least once in your life you wrote, drew, made or sang something, and you didn't even notice what time it is. Again, how can you get bored when you're inspired? Not likely. 

Some people, again, think that it is unfair of God that He sends sinners to eternal torment. They think that God punishes them. But that is not true. Hell is not a punishment, it is a consequence. How can a prideful person enter Heaven? Heaven would be a Hell for that man, he wouldn't stand everyone being equal, in perfect accordance, no one bragging about his place. How can a fornicator enjoy Heaven when he cannot practice his passion? It is love of God that prevents sinners from entering Heaven. Think about it.

(Unknown)

18 Reasons Why I Don't Wash Myself

One priest got tired of listening to excuses why people skip the Church, and has written this:

18 reasons why I do not wash myself:

1. Because they made me wash myself when I was a kid.
2. Because they didn’t teach me to wash myself when I was a kid.
3. Those who wash themselves are hypocrites – they think they are cleaner than others.
4. Can not decide which soap is better.
5. I used to wash myself before, but then I got bored.
6. I wash myself only on the great feasts – on Nativity and on Easter.
7. None of my friends washes himself.
8. Will start to wash myself when I become old and dirty.
9. I have no time for washing myself.
10. Water is too cold in winter, and too hot in summer.
11. I do not want soap producers to make money on me.
12. It is inside that counts.
13. All soaps are the same. Different soaps were invented by swindlers.
14. All wars in the world are because of the soap.
15. Every soap has it’s flaws. I wash myself with 3 different soaps at once. Only this combination of soaps is correct.
16. Science has proved it already since the 19th century, no soap, even the ideal, can wash down all molecules and atoms of dirt. That is why washing yourself is a hoax and “opium for homeless”.
17. Every soap contains top hazardous chemical ingredients affecting your skin.
18. You shouldn't teach your kid to wash himself. When he will grow up he will understand whether he shall wash himself or not, and which soap to use.